Bar & Drinking Jokes
500 Jokes on 50 Pages
- Gay BarQ. What do you call a gay bar with no barstools? A. A fruit stand
- gorrillaIt was closing time at the local sports-oriented pub and the only people left there were the bar keep, a drunk, and a gorilla standing in the corner. The barkeep looks at the drunk and said, "Wanna se
- The Ocotpus!A man walks into a bar and he has a pet octopus. He sits down at the bar and says to the bartender "give us two beers over here!" The bartender walks over and see's the octopus and he says, "Didn'
- TaxidermistA guy walks into a bar in Oklahoma and orders a white wine. Everybody sitting around the bar looks up, surprised, and the bartender looks around and says, "You ain't from around here, are ya? Where ya
- RoverA guy walks into a bar with his dog and says, "I'll have a Scotch and water and my dog would like a whiskey sour." The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't allow animals in here." The dog replies, "He
- CelebratingA young man walked up and sat down at the bar. "What can I get you?" the bartender inquired. "I want 6 shots of Jagermeister," responded the young man. "6 shots?!? Are you celebrating somethin
- $2000A man goes into a bar and sees a pile of cash on a table beneath a big sign that reads "$2,000 Cash Prize! See bartender for details." Keeping one eye on the stack of money, the man goes over and asks
- 200 More DollarsA guy goes into a bar and goes up to the bartender. He says "I bet you 200 bucks I can piss in that glass in the corner and not spill a drop." The bartender agreed knowing he could never do it. So the
- Where's the Bathroom?This guy is sitting in a bar drunk. He asks the bartender where's the bathroom at? The bartender said, go down the hall and make a right. Well, all of a sudden, everybody at the bar hear's
- Jumper cablesA pair of jumper cables walks into a bar, sits down on the stool and orders a beer. The bartender looks them over for a second and says, "Okay, you can stay, but you'd better not start anything."